Monday, February 12, 2024

Good morning, have a good writing session

 Happy Monday. I hope today you have a good writing session. What is a good writing session? One in which you stay in process, do not trash yourself with expectations and demands, don't try to "catch up", have a good entry,  focus on one sentence at a time, and write for a healthy, sustainable amount of time.

There is a lot more to it than that, or perhaps, there is not . 

Thursday, December 7, 2023

Expanding My Coaching Practice

As I prepare to retire after 25 year as a college professor, I am expanding my coaching practice. For 14 years, I have helped academic thrive in ways they never thought possible. Let's have a complementary chat, even if you are only one percent interested. I love helping!


Saturday, November 18, 2023

To Be Yourself


When you reach the limits of what is expected of you, you come to same dilemma: to be yourself.

Paraphrased from a distant memory, Henry Miller's Tropic of Capricorn. 

Monday, October 23, 2023

Ten Reasons Why I Am Retiring From Faculty to Coach Full Time


1

When you reach the limits of what is demanded of you, you reach the same dilemma, to be yourself, Henry Miller. 


2

My sister is dying of brain cancer.


3

I am dying too, as are you, we just don’t know the date.


4

My dog is cute AF, and if this does not work out, someone will take us in.


5

I can coach my butt off. I may suck at other things, but at coaching, I am awesome-sauce.. 


6

Everything I have ever done has led me to this.


7

Because I can help you write. A lot. Without killing yourself. Fact.


8

Go big or go home. We are all going home.


9

Because I get to spend each and every day being part of the journeys of amazing people. 


10

Come find out ðŸ¦„🦄🦄




Saturday, September 23, 2023

Workbooks to Help You With Self Talk and Other CBT Tools

Not everyone has access to quality mental health services. As such, it is important that we have, for ourselves and others, self help tools to help us work through some of lives more challenging problems, and to help us grown and change. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy oriented workbooks are a great way of working through (non-clinical, or perhaps best said sub-clinical) depression, anxiety and other mental health issues.

Please note--I am NOT suggesting these INSTEAD of therapy or medication. If you are suffering from severe anxiety, depression or any other mental health concerns that are greatly impacting your functioning, please seek help. If you are thinking of harming yourself or others, please seek help.

However, if you have no access and if your condition is not serious enough to seek therapy or medication, or if you are hoping to grow and change in key areas, workbooks can be part of your self help toolbox.


Last spring, I actually had an assignment in my graduate cognitive therapy course in which students selected and worked through a CBT oriented workbook. In my course evaluations, seven or eight students highlighted that work as one of the most important things they did in their whole graduate social work program. Wow. I have also used these as supplements to my work with clients, suggesting they work though one of these in order to assist our work together.


Using these workbooks are a great way to work on your self talk--the topic of the last several of my blog posts. Some of these workbooks are related to specific conditions, while others are more general tools to help you with your mental health and resiliency. Try one, and let me know how they work.


In no particular order:


The CBT Toolbox, Second Edition: 185 Tools to Manage Anxiety, Depression, Anger, Behaviors & Stress







Monday, September 18, 2023

Follow up: Narratives That Don’t Serve You

Yesterday, I asked you to engage in some reflection about the narratives that are negative and destructive to you. Today, I want you to think of the one narrative that is most vexing: the one that you most want to change.


Today, I want you to do three, five-minute free writes. During your sessions, I want you to think of how you can change that narrative to one that is TRUE and HELPFUL. True and helpful. No Polyanaish fantasies. If your narrative is about your writing being superficial and “not deep enough” (thank you very much doctoral advisor!), you are not going to believe a narrative in which you reauthor your story to be “ I am the most profound writer ever.”  The truth might be that your writing is grounded enough in theory, experience, research, etc.,, that it will make a contribution to your profession but is not axis shifting work (nor is mine!). That is enough! 


This is just an example--I want you to spend time writing some counter-narratives that you can buy into. These are going to give you the clues to important self-talk that you will need to repeat to yourself a few hundred times to believe.


Sunday, September 17, 2023

Exercise: What Narratives Do Not Serve You?

 It has been a while since I have given my readers an exercise. Here is one now!

What are some dominant narratives that interfere with your happiness, wellbeing, productivity, and/or being your best self? What stories do you tell yourself that get in your way?


Set your timer for five minutes and do a free write--write without thinking or judgment, based upon these questions. Do this a few times and see what you find. What you uncover can be an important part of