But Why Time Myself at All?

A few thoughts, nothing grand....

Why should you use a timer for writing or other tasks?

Because time can be used as a push, as energy, as a source of motivation. Without the container of time, it is often hard to push ourselves in the moment. For example, I use a timer when grading. I decide on how much time I will allocate per paper, and push myself through, using time to contain the task. Otherwise, I can take all day.

Or all week even..

Time is a push because it is finite. It is why existentialists ask us to frequently consider death----the end can push us to make important choices with our time.

Toxic People?

The term "dysfunctional families" become vogue in the 80s. If we listened to pop-psych pundits, everyone came from a dysfunctional family. Yet, if this were true, if nearly all families were so broken that they could not care for children well enough to help them become thriving adults, than why are there so many amazing people around? Clearly, the research on resiliency and "good enough parenting" suggests that in spite of their problems, most families seem to do ok! The dysfunctional family discourse was also very, very classist, gendered and racist--the variables and traits of what was termed a dysfunctional family were those clearly associated with the problems of poverty and oppression. Structural barriers were minimized and the family was blamed for the limitations of various systems.

Researchers, scholars, practitioners and advocates have challenged and debunked "the dysfunctional family" by their work in the critical sociology and criminology, the strengths perspective of social work, positive psychology and resiliency theory.

In spite of knowing better, however, many on social media continue to fall pray to an extension of this discourse, without even considering what they are doing. The cultural of pathologizing other human begins continues in full force: we now have "toxic people", the pathologizing diss of the day:

“That person is toxic"

“My dissertation chair was so toxic”

“My colleagues are toxic”

“I am going to get rid of toxic people from my life”

Ever think about the implications of totally pathologizing "the other"?'

First, it strips people of their complexity, fullness, and  humanity. They are toxic, poisoned and poisonous, and thus, not worthy of redemption. We need to clean them up--get rid of this toxicity. Like cancer. Frankly, any discourse that dehumanizes the totality of another others worries me as a human being, but in particular as a Jew who has struggled with disability.

Second, by blaming issues and problems on the toxicity of the other creates no space for relationship, redemption and healing. Forget restorative justice!

Third, they are the problem, and you have no responsibility, right? If your concerns are due to the toxicity of another, and that alone, you give away part of your power, your agency--the ability to critically reflect upon what is going wrong and make changes.

Fourth, if the problem lies within the toxicity of others, it discourages us from a systems perspective. If individuals are fundamentally the problem than any structural or systematic issue tend to be minimized.

Last, if everyone is calling out everyone else for their being toxic, you are at some point going to be the target. YOU will be the problem, 100 percent of the problem in some context, no? I don't see anybody jumping up and down owning their own "toxicity" but these toxic people have to be somewhere, no? Are they hiding in some massive underground cave? A private toxic island their own volcano lair?

No, at the end of the day, there is no such thing as a toxic person. There are only human beings with problems and strengths, with capacities and vulnerabilities. We are all complex constellations of goodness and a wee bit of funk.

A bit of humanity and generosity might go a long way right about now.  I am not going to give any proscriptive suggestions here--this one is for contemplation.

Everything you MUST have in order to write :)

Timer: Writing When Overwhelmed

Building upon the last post.....

Set timer, five minute or ten minutes. 

Mantra/self talk. “I might think I am too busy to write, but I can do so for ten minutes. Nothing will change, other than my having written. I have ten minutes. It will be ok.”

Repeat mantra twenty times J

Repeat timed writing. 

For a week.

Or a month.

Or a year.

See what happens.

Timer-For Feeling Overwhelmed

You can feel overwhelmed for a variety of reasons. When you are feeling so overwhelmed that you feel (believe) that you cannot possibility do anything else, set the timer for ten minutes, and start one task. Don’t just tell yourself you are going to do it for ten minutes, but instead, set the timer. Feel the presence of time. 

Tell yourself (self talk), I don't have to do this for any more than ten minutes. Ten minutes only. Try to finish the task this way, ten minutes at a time, if you can. If not, just feel good about having used the ten minutes.

Do one more task, ten minutes.

And then another.

See if you don't feel some relief.

A multitude of life’s tasks can be resolved in short blocks of time.

The Use of Timers

I really like using timers to help me not only with my writing, but with many other tasks as well. 

Beyond how they are used in the Pomodoro method (and, I would argue that there is nothing magical about the 25 minute session—we need to experiment to see how long is really best is for us), there are some really cool uses for how we can use timers to help us use time as a tool for focus, motivation, and consistency. 

I will explore a few of these tools and tricks over the next few posts, mostly by focusing on the types of problems that timers can help you with.