The Path of Uncertainty

A great paradox of emotional health is that we must know when to accept our feelings and when to work toward moving out of them; through them. We must know when to lean into them, accept them, and cherish them. That does not mean that we do not seek to change painful emotions by altering cognitions that are causing us harm, but instead means that we must become comfortable enough with them to not run from them.

Anxiety, on a spiritual level, is about our deep "need" to predict outcomes, to know, and to even control, the future. In order to not be ruled by anxiety, we must learn to accept the fundamental uncertainly of life. We must bend into and even embrace the path of uncertainty.

Such lessons of course apply to the fabric of our lives, but are also key in helping us become more productive and joyful scholars. All we can control is our effort. Even the completion of a paper, a dissertation, a book, is unknown. We put in the effort, and come to trust that our efforts, day in, and day out, will lead to possible outcomes. We invest in good habits, build skills, work to resolve our psychosocial barriers and maximize our strengths, and let go of future results.

Stay in the process, each day, and learn to bend into the path of uncertainty.

80/20 principle-Applied to our work here!

During a coaching call with one of my favorite scholars, unnamed arts based researcher made the apt connection between the Pareto principle and finishing an article. It was an insightful comment. The Pareto principle, which has been applied far beyond its initial formulation, is taken to suggest that 80% of effort goes into 20% of the effect related to various outcomes.

The exact percent of the effort is not important. What is important to note is that there is a tendency for scholars to put in far more effort at finishing an article then is often needed.  Anxiety and fear, our current topics, play a powerful role here. Afraid of negative outcomes and anxious about letting go of their work, scholars often edit, copywrite, and fret over the number of citations. Did I find every article related to topic X? Have I really justified every discussion point? Double check. Triple check. Obsess.

The review process is so idiosyncratic, so whimsical, that we have to let go.  The goal is not perfection, but to do a strong, workperson like job and then let go.

To the degree possible, be aware of aligning your effort with your production. Don't spend an inordinate about of time on small details; its usually a waste of effort.  We are not able to control everything. Work hard, let go. Move on. Next article :).

Radio Interview About our Book: Sex Crimes: Transnational Problems and Global Perspectives

Dr. Alissa Ackerman, my co-editor of Sex Crimes: Transnational Problems and Global Perspectives, is interviewed about our chapter on masculinities! Check it out, she does a great job.

Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish

The last words of Steve Job's powerful graduation speech at Stanford University, "Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish."

Those who know me, really know me, know that I am a crier. Not once in a while, and not only when in response to deep loss, but I cry when highly emotional: sad, angry, moved, nostalgic, joyful, ect.

Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish- that did it to me today. Sitting here, listening to the power of his words, I really started feeling choked up.  The dogs in my lap, some moments to write before I start working on a grant review.

Life is so bittersweet. Careers are so bitter sweet. But how lucky we are, to be able to play with words. Writing, such a wonderfully foolish, foolish thing to do.

Anxiety:The Relaxation Response

Sometimes, we do not wish to engage in multiple measures to resolve a problem. There can be many reasons. Our lives may be so busy that it feels overwhelming and impractical to add more "things that are good for us" to our day. Or, perhaps anxiety, fear or stress are not as problematic for you as they are for others; you don't need a comprehensive, personalized, holistic program.

If this is the case, I would like to recommend a classic book for you,  The Relaxation Response by Herbert Benson. An oldie but a goodie, it is a simple, evidence based approach that has stood the test of time. I highly recommend reading it.

Exercise: Correlates to Anxiety

As next week I will begin to explore anxiety (transitioning from the related concept of fear, although not done with it yet), I would like to suggest a simple, but "risky" exercise.

I want you to put yourself into a writing "situation" that makes you anxious. Consciously engage in some form of writing activity where you have, historically, experienced anxiety. As you engage in the task, I want you to notice your thinking, feelings, and behaviors. Make note of them. Try this a few times and see if your ability to identify them improves.

This ability to be self aware of the associated cognitive, affective, and behavioral correlates to your anxiety is the first step toward resolving it.

Fear of Success?

Fear of success? What is that really? Is this one unitary condition?

I typical hear people refer to this "condition" when they engage in some type of self-defeating behavior. I firmly believe this is an unhelpful social construction, just like "writers block." It is a pop-psychology term used to oversimplify many potential constellations of self-downing and anxiety causing beliefs. Be careful of such glib oversimplifications; they can prevent you from really doing the type of work you need to do to change. Adopting cheap platitudes is not a replacement for dedicating oneself to growth.